Sunday, April 09, 2006
Where are the Ugly Writers?
Remember when writers were ugly? Jowly, bald, fat, slovenly -- that was the writerly look for ages. Writers were the anti-photogenic strivers that lurked on the margins. Now, it seems like everyone's a looker. Just thumb through the NY Times Sunday Book Review on any given Sunday - damn, when did novelists become major babes and hunkolicious studs? I do hope this isn't a new prerequisite for publication -you know, a nifty prose style and a creamy complexion, that kind of thing. Otherwise, I'm in deep shit.
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Actually, I don't remember when novelists were ugly. I guess we don't really know what Jane Austen looked like but the Bronte sisters were quite attractive. Daniel Defoe looked OK and so did Joseph Conrad. Herman Melville wasn't really handsome but I don't think he was jowly, fat, bald or slovenly. Charles Dickens was a pretty handsome guy. George Eliot--not gorgeous but certainly not ugly. Virgina Wolfe--beautiful. Faulkner--good looking. James Joyce, Henry James, DH Lawrence, Toni Morrison, Joan Dideon, John Steinbeck, Richard Brautigan--all fairly good looking. Jack Kerouac and Ernest Hemingway--both quite handsome. Thomas Hardy, William Thakeray, and John Updike--not really good looking but not offensively ugly. Who are all these ugly novelists you're talking about?
I did read sometime back of a phone call made to a writer's agent by a somewhat-embarrased publisher, who asked for a photograph of the writer. The publisher clearly wanted to be sure that a jacket photograph and TV interviews would present a physically attractive person, regardless of the quality of the writing.
The industry is primed for a scandal of Milli Vanilli proportions.
leisureguy: A J Jacobs writes of something like that in his book "The Know-it-all".
Actually George Eliot was pretty bad. The portraits were kind, the camera told no lies. Auden had jowls. Henry James was more than a little stout. Buwkowski was no looker but he's technically, so how about G.K. Chesterton? Don't see many like him any more. It might be the cape.
* technically a poet
Ugly writers? Two words:
Tom. Clancy.
*shiver*
print journalists though! we're all quite hideous. i think it's because we don't have nice lighting and makeup people.
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